Un Autre Monsieur de Boissons ?
Yesterday morning I left Melbourne for Anglesea. I left about an hour late, but hey, Paulina's had her fair share of being late too. After filling up the tank in the M-Beast, I cruised over the Westgate and on through Geelong, pumping the Dreamgirls soundtrack and singing at the top of my lungs...
we're your dreamgirls...
boy, we'll make you happy, yeah-ah
we're your dreamgirls...
boys, we'll always care
we're your dreamgirls...
dreamgirls will never leave you, no, no
and you have to do is dream...
baby we'll be there
It was so gay, I thought the car was going to convert into a mobile 1970's club, complete with leather walls, fireman poles, light-up floors and glitter... everywhere. Or maybe I was hoping that would happen. Anyway...
When I got into Anglesea I reminded myself that I would be surrounded by straight boys for the weekend, so I should clean up my act to not embarrass Paulina. So I threw on my sunnies, lit up a fag and changed the music to Lenny Kravitz.
i wish that i could fly
into the sky
so very high
just like a dragonfly
i'd fly above the trees
over the seas in all degrees
to anywhere i please
oh i want to get away
i want to fly away
yeah yeah yeah
I started to really get into it, so much so, that right now, I'm listening to Lenny. Strange. So I arrived to the house on Allen Street, on the measly directions Paulina had so kindly given me..
'Geelong, Torquay, Anglesea, big roundabout, shops on right, pub, turn right, school, right, allen left, blue roof, modern'
Uhuh.
The house was really cute, 4 bedrooms working off a main hallway with a large living room on one end, kitchen and bathroom on the other. There was a porch area where a table was set up, where we were to spend most of our time. As soon as I got there, Paulina, Amanda and I headed down to the beach to meet Joel and Mooch. When we got there, the girls and I decided to just sit for a bit and watch the boys surf. We were sitting in spitting rain, so it wasn't very comfortable, but it was warm and fun nonetheless. Joel came out of the water, with Mooch not far behind, and coaxed me to come out for a surf with him. He was going to teach me. Paulina started having a go at Joel, telling him to leave me alone, but I realised that it was something I'd always wanted to do, so why not do it...
I was lying on the board, floating out in the ocean with Joel standing in front of the board, pulling me out further, waiting for the right waves. He taught me how to paddle. So I learnt. He sent me on my first wave, which consisted of him spinning the board around, waiting for the wave to come, yelling at me to start paddling, and then pushing the board forward for me to gain some momentum.
And I caught my first wave. And I loved it. I just lay there, riding the wave, thinking how awesome life was...
After a few more times, I tried kneeling on the board which was a lot easier than I thought it would be. By that time, it wasn't spitting, it was raining. Joel got me to try standing on the board, which I did a few times, but the glory was short lived and I dived straight into the water. It got harder to get up on the board as we went along, because my arms felt so weak from the paddling. We headed back to the shore where I was met with cheers and applause from Paulina, so proud of my surfer boy attempts. How I'd love to be a surfer boy.
I felt so weak I almost collapsed on the beach, since in the last week, I'd had three separate physical workouts, from dancing with Tovaris to surfing. We headed back to Allen Street, where we all hung out and waited for Scotty's arrival. It was funny looking at the driveway, with the two station wagons, the M-Beast and Scotty's ute.
'Paulina. Spot the gay car...'
Then everyone left to do their thing and Paulina and I were left doing nothing together. So we started playing Uno. Once everyone got back, everybody started playing, and the drinking started. After about 5 beers, and two hours of Uno, we got dinner ready which was salad, potatoes, onion and bangers. We drank more (moving onto wine, then back to beer), before tucking into some poker, complete with chips. After a few rounds, I had doubled my takings and killed off two of the opposition. Beginners luck I guess, but I wouldn't mind the chance to check that theory at Crown... Hehe. After one of Joel's strange drink concoctions, we started playing a card game introduced by Amanda, called 'Skip-Bo'. Say what? After a few rounds, everyone kinda learnt what was going on...
Paulina called for the lighting of the joint I had brought, which was originally going to be shared by only Paulina and myself, until it was lit, and Joel, Mooch and Amanda thankfully jumped in for some drags. 10 minutes later, and there was non-stop laughter. I felt so completely fucked up. Everything was so funny, and it was as if Paulina and I were transmitting jokes through telekinesis, because we'd just look at each other and laugh. I've never had a joint hit me so hard before. At one point, I was looking over Paulina's shoulder, looking at the horizon (in the pitch black distance) thinking that I could see the lights from Melbourne's CBD. I knew I was hallucinating, so I did everything I could to not say anything to anyone.
*stay silent dean. if you say something, everyone will think you are crazy*
Then there was the part where we all started fighting because apparently I started playing the Skip-bo game when it wasn't my turn. Note to self: Never play cards when fucked off your head.
mooch: *pointing at me* what the hell is he doing?
*everyone turns to see me playing*
dean: isn't it my turn?
paulina: yeah, it's his turn *laughing*
mooch: umm...
everyone: umm... i don't know...
*laughter*
After it became a bit chilly, we headed inside, by which time we had changed card games to Spoons, where you pick up discarded cards from the person next to you, while discarding cards to the other person next to you, in an attempt to get four of a kind, at which time, you pick up one of the 4 spoons (5 of us were playing) and wait for everyone else to battle over the remaining 3 spoons. The punishment for losing started off as having to skull a latte glass filled with red wine. After that became unbearable, we changed it to beer.
We played for ages, to the point where I had become so insanely drunk, I was holding myself up against the coffee table we were playing on. Whenever someone else was dealing, I'd start playing the game before all the cards had been dealt. Only because everyone was picking up their cards up to sort them out. And drunken me, was hallucinating that the game had already started. Paulina was getting worried about me, trying to reassure me that if I didn't want to drink (for losing) I didn't have to. Um... Yeah. Right. Those boys wouldn't let me get away without drinking it, and I didn't want to be the small gaysian that couldn't hold his drink. So they nominated a time to stop. 5 games remaining. But now, we added a few challenges. Everyone renamed themselves. I was Michael, Mooch was Terry, Joel was Rashaad, and Scotty was Clive. If anyone was to call each other by their real names or swear (curse), a punishment drink would be served. Joel was the only one to screw up with names. Then there was me, when I lost the third game straight out of the last 5...
*everyone grabs for the spoons as Scotty (Clive) wins*
dean: aww. and I had four of a kind as well.
*dean holds up four cards. all of the same number*
boys: hahahaha
dean: ...and that's the second time that's happened.
boys: hahahaha
dean: fuck.
boys: whoa....hahahaha
dean: shiiiiioooooot.
boys: hahahaha
Fuck off to anyone who says I can't handle my alcohol. I drank the most out of three straight boys over a period of 7 hours. Clicks to me. Haha. I ended up losing all 5 of the games I think. At which point I stood up and almost collapsed against the door. I went to pee, and then stood in my bedroom, where Paulina had brought in a doona for me. I changed my pants... I think... I can't remember... And collapsed onto the bed. Then I remember hugging a watermelon. And that's it... Really. A watermelon. There are pictures.
Good times.
iTunesNowPlaying : Lenny Kravitz _ Black Velveteen
we're your dreamgirls...
boy, we'll make you happy, yeah-ah
we're your dreamgirls...
boys, we'll always care
we're your dreamgirls...
dreamgirls will never leave you, no, no
and you have to do is dream...
baby we'll be there
It was so gay, I thought the car was going to convert into a mobile 1970's club, complete with leather walls, fireman poles, light-up floors and glitter... everywhere. Or maybe I was hoping that would happen. Anyway...
When I got into Anglesea I reminded myself that I would be surrounded by straight boys for the weekend, so I should clean up my act to not embarrass Paulina. So I threw on my sunnies, lit up a fag and changed the music to Lenny Kravitz.
i wish that i could fly
into the sky
so very high
just like a dragonfly
i'd fly above the trees
over the seas in all degrees
to anywhere i please
oh i want to get away
i want to fly away
yeah yeah yeah
I started to really get into it, so much so, that right now, I'm listening to Lenny. Strange. So I arrived to the house on Allen Street, on the measly directions Paulina had so kindly given me..
'Geelong, Torquay, Anglesea, big roundabout, shops on right, pub, turn right, school, right, allen left, blue roof, modern'
Uhuh.
The house was really cute, 4 bedrooms working off a main hallway with a large living room on one end, kitchen and bathroom on the other. There was a porch area where a table was set up, where we were to spend most of our time. As soon as I got there, Paulina, Amanda and I headed down to the beach to meet Joel and Mooch. When we got there, the girls and I decided to just sit for a bit and watch the boys surf. We were sitting in spitting rain, so it wasn't very comfortable, but it was warm and fun nonetheless. Joel came out of the water, with Mooch not far behind, and coaxed me to come out for a surf with him. He was going to teach me. Paulina started having a go at Joel, telling him to leave me alone, but I realised that it was something I'd always wanted to do, so why not do it...
I was lying on the board, floating out in the ocean with Joel standing in front of the board, pulling me out further, waiting for the right waves. He taught me how to paddle. So I learnt. He sent me on my first wave, which consisted of him spinning the board around, waiting for the wave to come, yelling at me to start paddling, and then pushing the board forward for me to gain some momentum.
And I caught my first wave. And I loved it. I just lay there, riding the wave, thinking how awesome life was...
After a few more times, I tried kneeling on the board which was a lot easier than I thought it would be. By that time, it wasn't spitting, it was raining. Joel got me to try standing on the board, which I did a few times, but the glory was short lived and I dived straight into the water. It got harder to get up on the board as we went along, because my arms felt so weak from the paddling. We headed back to the shore where I was met with cheers and applause from Paulina, so proud of my surfer boy attempts. How I'd love to be a surfer boy.
I felt so weak I almost collapsed on the beach, since in the last week, I'd had three separate physical workouts, from dancing with Tovaris to surfing. We headed back to Allen Street, where we all hung out and waited for Scotty's arrival. It was funny looking at the driveway, with the two station wagons, the M-Beast and Scotty's ute.
'Paulina. Spot the gay car...'
Then everyone left to do their thing and Paulina and I were left doing nothing together. So we started playing Uno. Once everyone got back, everybody started playing, and the drinking started. After about 5 beers, and two hours of Uno, we got dinner ready which was salad, potatoes, onion and bangers. We drank more (moving onto wine, then back to beer), before tucking into some poker, complete with chips. After a few rounds, I had doubled my takings and killed off two of the opposition. Beginners luck I guess, but I wouldn't mind the chance to check that theory at Crown... Hehe. After one of Joel's strange drink concoctions, we started playing a card game introduced by Amanda, called 'Skip-Bo'. Say what? After a few rounds, everyone kinda learnt what was going on...
Paulina called for the lighting of the joint I had brought, which was originally going to be shared by only Paulina and myself, until it was lit, and Joel, Mooch and Amanda thankfully jumped in for some drags. 10 minutes later, and there was non-stop laughter. I felt so completely fucked up. Everything was so funny, and it was as if Paulina and I were transmitting jokes through telekinesis, because we'd just look at each other and laugh. I've never had a joint hit me so hard before. At one point, I was looking over Paulina's shoulder, looking at the horizon (in the pitch black distance) thinking that I could see the lights from Melbourne's CBD. I knew I was hallucinating, so I did everything I could to not say anything to anyone.
*stay silent dean. if you say something, everyone will think you are crazy*
Then there was the part where we all started fighting because apparently I started playing the Skip-bo game when it wasn't my turn. Note to self: Never play cards when fucked off your head.
mooch: *pointing at me* what the hell is he doing?
*everyone turns to see me playing*
dean: isn't it my turn?
paulina: yeah, it's his turn *laughing*
mooch: umm...
everyone: umm... i don't know...
*laughter*
After it became a bit chilly, we headed inside, by which time we had changed card games to Spoons, where you pick up discarded cards from the person next to you, while discarding cards to the other person next to you, in an attempt to get four of a kind, at which time, you pick up one of the 4 spoons (5 of us were playing) and wait for everyone else to battle over the remaining 3 spoons. The punishment for losing started off as having to skull a latte glass filled with red wine. After that became unbearable, we changed it to beer.
We played for ages, to the point where I had become so insanely drunk, I was holding myself up against the coffee table we were playing on. Whenever someone else was dealing, I'd start playing the game before all the cards had been dealt. Only because everyone was picking up their cards up to sort them out. And drunken me, was hallucinating that the game had already started. Paulina was getting worried about me, trying to reassure me that if I didn't want to drink (for losing) I didn't have to. Um... Yeah. Right. Those boys wouldn't let me get away without drinking it, and I didn't want to be the small gaysian that couldn't hold his drink. So they nominated a time to stop. 5 games remaining. But now, we added a few challenges. Everyone renamed themselves. I was Michael, Mooch was Terry, Joel was Rashaad, and Scotty was Clive. If anyone was to call each other by their real names or swear (curse), a punishment drink would be served. Joel was the only one to screw up with names. Then there was me, when I lost the third game straight out of the last 5...
*everyone grabs for the spoons as Scotty (Clive) wins*
dean: aww. and I had four of a kind as well.
*dean holds up four cards. all of the same number*
boys: hahahaha
dean: ...and that's the second time that's happened.
boys: hahahaha
dean: fuck.
boys: whoa....hahahaha
dean: shiiiiioooooot.
boys: hahahaha
Fuck off to anyone who says I can't handle my alcohol. I drank the most out of three straight boys over a period of 7 hours. Clicks to me. Haha. I ended up losing all 5 of the games I think. At which point I stood up and almost collapsed against the door. I went to pee, and then stood in my bedroom, where Paulina had brought in a doona for me. I changed my pants... I think... I can't remember... And collapsed onto the bed. Then I remember hugging a watermelon. And that's it... Really. A watermelon. There are pictures.
Good times.
iTunesNowPlaying : Lenny Kravitz _ Black Velveteen
posted by Christopher at 11:46 PM
2 Comments:
oh i miss you guys
oh i remember good times playing spoons. so many times i'd be there passing cards along and totally not notice that everyone had picked up a spoon. i really can't multitask...
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